I SUPORT YOU GIRL! 
Empowering African American Women

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Being Me, An African American Woman

Being an African American woman juggling a career, relationships, kids, and life is a rollercoaster of resilience, grace, and sheer strength. Our journeys are packed with unique challenges and victories that shape who we are.  Often, I feel so much is expected of me, that I am tired before I get out of bed!   What were you taught about your role  as an African American woman, and have you accepted this role?  Who taught you this lesson and has it worked for you?  It wasn’t working for me.  I don’t want to be STRONG all the time!  I am tired of carrying the load with my public face on when I am dying inside, and I won’t do this anymore.
As an African American woman, building a career can feel like navigating a maze of biases and stereotypes. Even with all the progress over the years, the professional world still throws some serious curveballs our way.  We often find ourselves in the position of being the only African American woman at the table.  While we have learned to handle this position, it may feel tiring as you compartmentalize and code-switch constantly.  I want to be the same Bridgitte every day in all situations.  Is this even possible?   Can I bring my whole self to the table, leveraging my unique experiences, and use my voice to push for change?
Balancing a career and personal life is an art form. It’s a constant dance of prioritizing, delegating, and sometimes making tough calls. Therefore, self-care is a must. Unfortunately, we use the words self-care in such a broad sense we often feel overwhelmed as we attempt to seek out self-care.  Don’t forget self-care can be a bath or shower, reading a book, or sitting quietly in the backyard.  Please carve out time for rest, reflection, and rejuvenation. Whether it’s indulging in a hobby, meditating, or just hanging out with loved ones, these moments of relaxation are essential for your mental and emotional well-being.
Relationships are the backbone of our lives. Whether it’s with a partner, family, or friends, these connections give us love, support, and a sense of belonging. For African American women, relationships also mean navigating cultural expectations and sometimes dealing with intergenerational trauma.  Are we continuing in relationships because that is what is expected of us or because we want to be in the relationship?  Connecting with others who have similar experiences is often necessary to allow us to confide in others and seek support.  Frequently, African American women don’t seek support because we support so many.  Why is it difficult to put ourselves first?  We are just as important as our children, partners, family, and friends.  Stop being the strongest in your circle!  
Intergenerational trauma may keep us trapped in circumstances we want to escape from, but we are uncertain how we will escape.  Intergenerational trauma runs deeper in our families and ourselves than we often realize.  Have you identified yours?  That can be a painful process but when you come out at the other end and begin healing you will feel free and travel through life with less pain and more awareness.  Most importantly you can then prevent that trauma from hurting your children.  Bad relationships, lifelong hurts, loneliness, depression, and anxiety---DON’T PASS THIS ON TO YOUR CHILDREN.  Be an intergenerational curse breaker and allow yourself to enjoy life in a new way.
Bridgitte